Weather Watch on Monday, January 25, 2010

Today, a Monday, started as off as any normal Meridith Monday does. Absent-minded and rushed. I couldn't get myself out of bed, because the air in my room was so cold. So cold, in fact, that I imagined my life as a winter hermit, who lived in a heat tent underneath her own comforter. After coming to my senses and barreling out of bed, I was able to get ready and pack a breakfast in under 45 minutes, but I was still running fifteen minutes late.

As I rush out the door and take my first few steps outside, I stop dead in my tracks and see what's happening in front of me. There's a slight sprinkling of snow commencing its fall from the clouds above, and the air is as cold and icy as a deceived lover as it wraps around me like an airtight seal.

"Great," I think as I look down at my black pumps with no stockings to cover the bare skin of my feet, "my piddies are going to freeze today!"

Continuing my walk to the car, the wind pushes me just slightly off my balance. The rush of cold air seeps through my coat, beats its way through the barrier of my cotton sweater and silk top, and rests icily on top of my skin. As the goose bumps blush their way onto my skin, I stop to look at nothing, purse my lips and acknowledge the fact I stupidly chose to wear my "early winter/late fall" coat, which is light weight, due to the fact that the past few days warranted a lighter coat. However, I didn't bother to check Monday's forecast to dress appropriately.

"Seriously, Meridith, could you have paid anymore LESS attention to today's weather forecast?" I rhetorically ask my knowing self.

Being that I didn't want to be any later than I already was, I jumped in the car and made my way into the office. Traffic started off the bat as my CR-V made its way onto I-90 West. But getting further along, it broke up right before Rosemont. I love living in Chicago now, and I waited almost four years to do so; however, the fact it can take up to 75 minutes to drive only 20 miles into work baffles me.

Even though I woke up late and was running way behind schedule, I got to work at 8:42am-just twelve minutes past my desired time. Hurriedly, I grab my work bag and breakfast. I stepped out into the briskly chilly air and felt the wave of cool air rise up my legs and past my non-stocking'd, pump wearing feet. Shuffling across the black top of the parking lot, my feet felt like icicles and I wondered if I could make it to Target and back before our 10:00 a.m. conference call. "Deal with it, you dumbass," was all I could think to myself as I walked to the sales office door. I unlocked my way in, turned on the lights and stepped into my cubicle. Our office always runs cold, and today was exponentially more painful given my attire for the day-there was no way to gain my heat back and stay warm.

Note to self: Watch the news in the morning for weather updates!

Why population control is needed sometimes...

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29038814/


If you cannot take care of your children without support from family, friends, church or the government, then maybe you shouldn't have anymore...just an idea. Ok, let me rephrase that--your MAIN income shouldn't be from family, friends, church or government. Everyone gets help from time to time!

Nadya Suleman really pisses me off, and I can't really explain it as well as the video of her initial interview. It is obvious to me that she is effed up in the head. Alternative lifestyles are awesome! And I am all about invitro and artificial insemination for couples who want to have a family and can afford it. However, I am not about a woman having children to make herself feel fulfilled. With 7 children, if you don't feel fulfilled already, there is something else wrong and you need to seek help.

And with that last statement, I find it odd that her Master's Degree will be in counseling...THERE'S YER SIGN honey!

Ok, enough of this or I could be typing all night. And my fever still hasn't gone away from my flu and this topic would put me over the top.

Ode to the Chicagoan driver in snow

Auf wiedersehen to the first full work week in January 2009. I thank you for going by quickly and (for the most part) painlessly. Last night, as my friend and I were done working on our fitness, we were walking in the frigid cold back to our cars. Realizing I had 1 full day left in the week, I thought "Damn am I lucky this week flew by. Friday's going to be a cinch!"

And then I got home and turned on the news...and saw the weather forecast...of 3-6 inches...with fog...and ice...and of course, idiot drivers of Illinois. Now don't jump off the handle! I'm one of those idiot drivers of Illinois. However, I take pride in the fact that I know when to slow down the choo choo when the weather is shiteous outside.

Did you know that today's snowfall marks the 21st measurable snowfall Chicagoland has seen this winter? JUST this winter...it's amazing. What further amazes me is our inability to not drive like idiots in this. You would think after all these years, we'd learn.

There's always that person in the SUV or truck. You know the one. Thinking because they have 4WD they can plow along, going 50 while everyone is at 25 or 30, spitting the nasty slush on your car and breaking too late/too close to the car in front of them.

And so begins my first blog, Ode to the Chicagoan driver in snow:

*Ode to you Mr. Infiniti FX 35, license plate number G11 9933*

I think it's hot how your SUV can plow through the slush and the falling snow as you continue to rush upon the traffic ahead of you. Your total disregard of the other cars break lights is a huge turn-on. Do you see the break lights ahead lit up like a Christmas tree? Yeah, that means they're A) breaking or B) stopped.

I realize that Mr. Lexus in front of me got into the left lane as you were approaching us, but please know Mr. Lexus had plenty of room to get in front of you without making you have to slam on your breaks. As I, too, got into the left lane behind you, the distance between us became greater and greater as you refused to slow down or reduce your speed. Or perhaps, you just weren't paying attention to everyone else around being at a much more reasonable speed.

As Mr. Lexus mad his way back into the middle lane, I thought it quite chivalrous, Mr. Infiniti FX 35, how you sped up along side him to flip him the bird. I appreciate the fact that you stopped your car (in the middle of traffic with us having the green light) along side Mr. Lexus to continue yelling at him through your passenger window and his. I wonder if he heard you.

Furthermore, I found it quite endearing when, as we finally approached the red light and stopped to wait our turn for the next green, you put your car into park, got out of your car, went up to Mr. Lexus' drivers window, demanded he roll down his window, yelled at him, calling him a bizzy & kitty cat (insert the profanities with those clues) and told him to get out of the car if he had something to say to you.

How lucky your wife must be. To see you get that angered over road rage that you would actually uproot yourself from your car in this kind of weather! Such a strong man...

Do you NOT see that there is traffic behind you? Or that there's snow? Or that the green light might be coming? And I'll be damned if I miss another green light because you're trying to prove how big of a man you are as you curse Mr. Lexus out through the 3 inch crack he created as he rolled down his window.